Time ...

I was just browsing something to do with metastatic breast cancer and somehow I ended up looking at some videos on YouTube that Michelle Ann posted.  I had to give up looking at them because they made me sad as Michelle Ann was a friend through a forum and she died a few weeks ago of this disease. 

How long before I become one of the statistics of breast cancer?

Sometimes I wonder if I am fooling myself by thinking that I could have a future.  I am not sure where it is, and I am not sure that I really want to know where life is going to take me.  Some people crave fame, travel, excitement and wealth.  Personally I am content to just bumble along in life and concentrating on the little things; the little moments.  I have pretty much everything that I want at this point in my life, though these are not the things I dreamed of having.  I wanted to be married, have children but these are things that will never be and over time I have come to accept this.  Why waste your life hankering after something that you can never have?

Time is something that we all think of as endless, but for each one of us it is the thing that confines us more than anything else.  Not enough time in the day, didn't sleep long enough, no time to do certain things; we measure our lives in time ... how old we are ... how long since ... I have to be at work by ...  Why?  Time is only limited if we allow it to be that way.  When did the future become more important than the present?

Carpe Diem - if not now, when?